It has been a while since I wrote about minimalism last time but several minimalism principles have stayed in my life through these years. I try to buy only things I genuinely need and to choose sustainable products I can use for a long time. I travel light and my wardrobe is small. As a part of minimalism I want my life to be full of colours and experiences, I want to see meaning and value behind things I do and have. At the moment I am looking for minimalism that is focused on quality of life instead of just physical side of it.
During the pandemic I have given myself excuses to do things in an easy way. I do things that don’t provoke my thoughts at all. That is not who I am or who I want to be, I need something thought-provoking every day. When my life is not in balance I watch streaming services and listen to audio books I can’t remember afterwards. I drink too much coffee and eat food that makes me tired and can’t wait to go to bed in the evening but then sleep poorly and feel still tired when wake up.
Lately I have had a feeling I don’t know what to do. I have difficulties to adjust myself to my current situation. My sons are growing up and day by day need me less than they did before. I am proud of them and I love seeing them becoming smart and understanding adults yet it is hard to let them go, harder than I had thought in advance. I never saw this feeling coming. I had read about it but never thought it will be me. I never thought I will suddenly feel like a half of the person I used to be because I am not a full-time mother any more.
I am used to comfort myself with music but during the pandemic that is obviously not possible. Enjoying live concerts is a huge passion of mine and that energy is something that makes me feel connected and gives me encouragement. Music fills me with thoughts and makes me brave to leave my comfort zone. I never thought it is so hard to live without music either, I never thought I would have to.
During pandemic many people have lost their jobs and social circles and that way also a part of their identity and not only that. People have lost their financial security and many people also their health and even loved ones and all that will have consequences in the future. I am extremely lucky to have my health, my family and my home. My everyday life is quite normal considering our current situation and I feel I need to make it as good as possible. I feel I need to edit my life and then fill it with colours and emotions to get more energy.
It has been a long time since I properly cleaned my life, not only my home but also my mind, thoughts and habits and in today’s world it is something that needs to be done regularly. I need to remove things that are unnecessary, maybe even harmful, and add things that have meaning and good value. What I need is more healthy habits, real connection with people, more meditation, more good music, more good books and more art, more knowledge and all kind of sensational moments that make me feel strong emotions.
I already build some new habits during the first Covid year. My husband and I developed exercising routines and we do circuit training three times a week and walk outdoors every day. I limit my eating hours to give my body rest between meals. I started a daily journaling and hand writing ritual which I find extremely useful. Also, as a part of my pandemic activities I have built photo albums and added my home green plants and wall art which all were waiting on my to-do-list. It’s a start.